uh. contradiction there

if you say “i support all aces! this is a safe ace space! ace means anyone asexual demi or grey!”

and then also say,

“aces don’t experience any sexual attraction”  — uh, where did the demi and grey folks go suddenly?  and:

“it’s acephobic erasure to like X character having sex”  — uh, what about…the aces who have sex…

(yes, yes, i know, often people throw out any word-of-god or even canon ace identity in order to sex up a character. but uh… nuance? “inherently acephobic” suggests no ace could possibly interpret that character that way.

plus when the ‘confirmed ace’ situation is…more like, “too innocent/lazy to have sex” — ???  this is the “explicit representation” you’re fighting for??  you don’t think other aces might possibly be processing by rejecting that?)
just. look. “all aces” is damn broad. maybe consider if other aces could respond in X way before you call it inherently acephobic, yeah?

i know you can feel hurt and erased and there’s no easy way to accommodate all of us at once (see the repulsed vs not debates that cycle for just one example). i just…think we can do better.


One thought on “uh. contradiction there

  1. I wish I could click like on this post more than once. It happens way too frequently that I encounter ace bloggers who will affirm the asexuality of gray and demi folks when asked, but then say “asexuality is about lack of sexual attraction! if you experience sexual attraction, you’re not asexual” at any other time.

    Every time I make an original post on tumblr where I contest the idea that lack of sexual attraction should be held up as the only or most important definition of asexuality, I get people asking me “Wait do you mean asexuality in the umbrella sense, or actual/real asexuality?” (Maybe I should start responding with “I mean asexuality as in the identifying-as-asexual sense” or “I mean asexuality as in the thinking-asexual-is-a-useful-word-to-describe-your-sexual-orientation sense.”)

    Liked by 1 person

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