i am so sick of sliding and watching inertia make decisions for me

either in the drifting sense or in the powered-up-mega-momentum sense

it’s just impossible to — no it’s not.  i just don’t — ever turn.

it’s like a gridlocked d-pad ice tile with no diagonal movement.

and if i’ve been building up that energy to turn, the slightest thing will dissipate it, and even if it lasts the conditions have to be perfect for it to discharge in anything more than a puff of air.

i’m so tired of flowing all the time. but every time i try to be a rock i trip over my privilege and hurt people. and it’s not like i’m ever considered easygoing.

please, i don’t want an environment anymore because i don’t want to keep reacting to it, please, this defensive paladin reactive a.i. is so so tired, please.

please, none of this is consent.


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