meat and human and body. a love for gore, a squick for words.
And if I were to type like this?
Aside from coming across like a pretentious try-hard, I’d be tempting more than one ghost.
been way too scrambled to put together an ace/christianity zine contribution, but had a like, *Bing* yesterday of ~categories
- things i find comforting to believe, and (so therefore?) do
- things i would find comforting to believe, if only i could, but i don’t/can’t
- things i find discouraging to believe, and (so therefore?) don’t
- things i find discouraging to believe, yet do anyway (and perhaps would like not to?)
as i’m thinking about writing fiction again, i’m noticing how…not implausible, but un-writeable, certain things feel.
things i’d very much like to see written (or have happen), but cannot possibly seem to construct myself.
namely, at the moment, an arcflux character synching up with another character, so that yeses and noes and desires largely match and mismatches are no big deal.
…when ya fluctuate between repulsion-how-did-i-ever and desire-how-did-i-ever-not, and the latter comes with wanting to be desired (but the former sometimes means feeling dysphoric about being desired)
i cannot even write fix-it fiction.
and i hate that.
i am so sick of sliding and watching inertia make decisions for me Continue reading
Hokay. Honestly, from the state of my tumblr, we knew this was coming. Herein, I attempt to consolidate and elaborate. This post is a mix of personal and political, as ever.
[moving GIFs interspersed below the cut]